One Sunday morning in church, the First Lady asked all the single ladies to stand up. As I just sat there in my seat, she then said, “Ladies, even if you’re engaged to be married, you’re still considered dating until marriage (laughing as she stated that). The second she said that, I stood up, and she continued on with the announcement she wanted to share with the single ladies of the church. I went home that evening and all I could think about was that statement she shared. It made so much sense to me. Have you ever noticed on applications how we’re asked our marital status and the choices are: single, married, divorced, or widow?
All of this made me think about my dating moments. I will be honest: when I was dating, marriage wasn’t a topic or a goal for the future in any of the relationships. Now being a wife of ten years, I reflect on the question “Why did we stay so complacent in dating and not discuss marriage?” Giving privileges while dating, as if you’re married has become such the norm these days. But ladies—it should not be like this. We have to expect more.
Society has us thinking that when we’re dating and things are going well, why change it? Why get married—isn’t the license just a piece of paper? I’ve heard once you get married; things go left (or sour). Society has been okay with what we feel or do against what God says about marriage. But if you want a life that is pleasing to God, know that marriage is more than a piece of paper; it is a covenant relationship between God, man, and woman being united as one.
My husband and I love sharing our journey with others because we have been there, and we are not perfect. Our hearts desire is to express that marriage does matter, blessed marriages do exist, marriage can work, and marriage is all what you put into it. So if you’ve been dating for a long time, consider discussing marriage and how to take your relationship to the next level.